As Obedient as a Mosiquito

What is the purpose of life?  This life is a test.

We are made of a spirit and a physical body.  Before our physical bodies were created and we were born, our spirits lived in Heaven with God who is the Father of our spirits.  We were there a very long time, maybe even thousands of years or more.  We loved our Heavenly Father and wanted to become like Him so we learned from Him and progressed in our learning until we were finally at a point where He could test us to see if our hearts would still choose Him and His ways even in a setting where there were many other options.  So, He sent us to earth where we would gain a physical body and be in an environment full of other options.  Our memory would be temporarily wiped clean of our time in Heaven, yet when we would encounter truth - pure truth just as we had known in Heaven - something inside our spirits would stir and we would stop and wonder why it seemed familiar to us.  IF, we embraced that truth then another truth would be put in our path, and another, and another, until we had fully come to a spiritual rememberance and realization for ourselves that we are indeed passing the test and still choosing our Heavenly Father's way.

So, what does this have to do with a mosquito?  Well, all of the creations were made with specific roles to play in providing this opportunity for our testing.  The mosquitoes were commanded to pester us.  They are only being obedient to God when they perform that duty.  The weeds were instructed to grow in our gardens and be a hindrance - they love God and are being perfectly obedient.  The seasons with the blistering sun and the bitter cold winter are only being obedient to the pattern God commanded them to follow.

Since Adam and Eve left the Garden of Eden man has battled all of these (and more) challenges to their daily survival.  There comes a change of heart when we recognize the humility and faithfulness of a mosquito trying to suck our blood or a squash beetle trying to kill our zucchini plant.  When we recognize their obedient example it is hard to think of them as an enemy that needs destroyed.  It is all a test to see if we will respond with anger or if we will patiently learn to exercise righteous stewardship over them.  I like this talk with the story about Joseph Smith and the rattlesnake.

Just maybe this is the beginning to bring about Isaiah's words:  

 Isaiah 11:6

The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them.    

The Work of Thine Own Hands

Before learning all these truths I had seriously prepared several years worth of clothing and shoes for my children.  I had them all organized and labelled by size in bins.  After the Spirit told me to give it all away I was then told to replace it with fabric so their bigger sizes could truly be the work of my own hands (see D&C 42:40-42). 

The Spirit told me to get a floor-loom, a spinning wheel, a treadle-sewing machine, and a quilt frame.  I then researched cotton seeds and flax seeds and purchased those to learn how to grow cotton and linen.  We had replaced many things with wool and I was quite overwhelmed with the prospect of us really growing, harvesting, spinning, weaving, and sewing everything that I prayed with real concern over how we could possibly raise sheep as well.  The answer came immediately, "I have prepared someone else to raise the sheep, you just be obedient to what I have asked you to prepare."  This experience helped me realize more what a Zion-society would be.  It will be a place where we all share of our talents and gifts to build up Zion and freely help one another.  The equipment and seeds I was asked to gather may not even be for me to use.  It may be that we pool all of our resources together and each accept a trade to learn and willingly share the goods we have produced. 

Down the street from us lives a man who has spent much of his life caring for his orchard and garden.  He studied the trees and plants to know which ones would produce fruit in the Spring, which would produce early in the summer, then mid-summer, and late-summer, and early fall.  His harvest is continual and not too overwhelming because of the timing.  What a blessing his experience is and will be to many of us who have just depended on the grocery store for our produce.  Over the years as many of us have been caught up in spending our time and energy on all the entertainment and activities that the world offers, this man has been learning how to be a righteous steward over the earth he was given.           

Let all thy garments be plain..

So as we replaced some of the clothing we had thrown out this scripture seemed permanently branded into my mind and heart.

D&C 42:40-42

And again, thou shalt not be proud in thy heart; let all thy garments be plain, and their beauty the beauty of the work of thine own hands;

And let all things be done in cleanliness before me.

Thou shalt not be idle; for he that is idle shall not eat the bread nor wear the garments of the laborer.

Our denim jeans seemed to really nag at me and although they were cotton I knew they needed to go.  My daughters and I were left with mainly skirts and dresses and the Spirit confirmed that was the direction we were to go.  All the flashy stitching and bright colors seemed to scream for the wrong kind of attention.  So we stuck with the counsel in the passage above and kept our color scheme plain and simple.  Now each of us have about 6 or 7 dresses (or skirt and top combinations) and that is plenty.  The men and boys in our family have mostly khaki and some dark corduroy pants.  Their shirts are mostly all cotton button-ups.

A few of our skirts and dresses I have sewn myself.  I am definitely still working on improving that skill and plan to keep working at it until we are fully obedient to the counsel to produce it with our own hands.  I removed the tags from our other clothing because I felt that there were many 'name-brands' that were not to be brought into Zion.

As I searched for shoes made from natural materials I came across the concept of Earthing or Grounding and again felt the Spirit.  I had not ever considered the healing and energizing benefits of being connected to this amazing planet that was created for us.  Now most of our shoes have soles made with natural materials so we can still receive those benefits of being in touch with the earth.  We also spend a lot more time just going barefoot.  

Click here to watch an introduction to grounding.  I have not even watched the full-length of this movie.  I just felt the Spirit when I came across it and knew God was showing me the kind of footwear we should purchase.

    

Honest Goods

So here we were, a family with a strong testimony of preparedness who had just thrown out a good percentage of everything we owned - much of which was our emergency preparedness items.  It was a challenge for my husband who had some really expensive backpacking gear but the Spirit also told him who would need it more than he would.  So we literally gave almost everything away.  God was teaching us to take the resources that He had blessed us with and use them the way that He commanded.  What a great test for us to go through and learn that we really are just stewards not owners.  So now we needed to replace those items and as we set out to find replacements the Spirit guided our research.

We found that we were led to companies whose products were made and sold honestly.  Before this experience I did not even know what "Fair Trade" meant and now most everything in our home has been produced in a fair trade market.  The majority of things we bought came from the US from small family businesses who were doing their best to use the creations of the earth in a righteous way.  We bought some of our clothing from European countries because there just is not much of an organic wool market in the US.  We only brought into our home the amount of items that were needful and no more.  All excess that we had the Spirit directed us to freely give away.  We had a nice stainless steel fridge in our garage that we no longer needed and thought maybe we would sell but right before we posted it online we heard of some neighbors whose fridge had just broken and we knew where it needed to go.  That happened time after time where we were made aware of someone's need for the very thing we were getting rid of.  God helped us eliminate the items He told us to eliminate and blessed others in the process.

We started learning how to make things by hand- mostly sewing and crocheting for me and some wood-working for my husband.  This made us value and appreciate the work of others much more.  We came to understand that when we really live the Law of Consecration it will be because we all value one another's time, work, and abilities.  We will willingly share our talents for the benefit of God's kingdom.  The desire to get things at a cheaper price is not of the Lord.  It didn't matter if I could head to a store and buy an item for $10, the Lord would rather me spend $40 on the item and have it produced honestly - where no one was ripped-off in the process.

I wrote earlier of the time that we sorted through all of our clothing and I felt sick inside about the unnecessary amount that we had accumulated, but those feelings of a pained conscience were also due to the Spirit telling with with every item I had thought was a "steal" when I bought it, that it was offensive to God because of the dishonesty that went into it being produced and sold so cheaply.  I heard the Spirit say to me over and over regarding most of the items in our home "The Atonement has to cover that."  My heart was so weighed down with just how inclusive the suffering was that Christ endured.

We were not sent here to accumulate all the cheap goods that the world offers.  If our treasures are in the world then so is our heart.      

Really Living the Word of Wisdom

Several years ago I had been studying the Word of Wisdom and my conscience nagged at me saying "you are not living this."  There are many people who claim entrance into the Lord's House by claiming that they live in harmony with the Word of Wisdom when in fact they do not.  As we tried to make changes to our diet, it became very apparent to me that I relied heavily on meat in all of my recipes and meals.  It also became apparent to me that I had no idea when the fruits and vegetables were really in season.  Also, if we are eating them in their season then do we have need for any preservatives?  Will they even provide our bodies with much nourishment outside of their season?

It took several years before we could finally say that we were living it, then this past year the prompting came for us to eliminate all animal products from our diet.  We had shifted our reliance on meat to a reliance on eggs and dairy, so we again had to work to change our diet.  When all was said and done we realized that the Spirit had guided us to a point where we are no longer reliant on a freezer or fridge.

Eventually the earth will become as the garden of Eden and we will all be eating the fruits freely, the Lord is just helping us make the transition to that lifestyle.

Take time to read the first chapter of Daniel and the Word of Wisdom- make a special note of the blessings that are attached to eating this way.  I can personally testify that they are real.  Also, consider that the gift of a physical body was one of the greatest gifts we were given when we came to mortality.  We have stewardship over it and if we are not being wise stewards over the first gift God granted unto us then do we qualify for a second, or a third?    

 
Note:  We are commanded to eat meat sparingly in times of winter and famine only.  There most certainly will be times of famine ahead and many of us will be reliant upon meat to survive.  I am certain that meat will be eaten in a true spirit of thanksgiving during that time. 
 

A Different View on Preparedness

Before anyone reads this please re-read the first posting to this blog labelled "Obedience" and the posting right before this one labelled "A Vision of Zion."  This experience was for us and maybe a few others out there but definitely not for everyone- so don't throw out your food or sleeping bags unless you are told by the Spirit to do so. 

For years we had everything we thought that we needed in case of an emergency.  Our 72-hour kits, all the fancy back-packing gear and clothing, a year's supply of food storage for each family member, water drums, stoves and fuel, etc.  When the Spirit prompted us to remove all synthetics and plastics from our home we realized it included all these items that we had prepared.  It was a challenge and we hung on to them for several months unwilling to be obedient.  Finally we realized that we were placing our trust more in material items than in God.  So we began to remove the items and as we did the Spirit whispered directions to us "give the sleeping bags to this family, they will need them more than you" and "give your water containers to this family because nobody on that street has water stored."

We were prompted to remove all the items in our food storage that were laden with preservatives and synthetic additives.  We were told who to share those food items with because they had not stored any food at all so at least they would have something to eat.   


One of the promptings that kept coming from the Spirit was to become less dependent on electricity.  We had already switched over to a whole-foods diet but we depended heavily on electricity to grind wheat, blend almond milk, cook and bake, and wash dishes (among many other things).  We realized pretty quickly that we needed some different equipment if we were to do those things without electricity.  We had our back-up emergency propane-stoves and our battery-powered flash-lights but the Spirit said, "No, this is not a temporary thing, you must get ready for a whole new way of life."  Once our batteries run out, once there is no more gas for the generator, once the grid is officially down, all these appliances are just going to take up space in our homes (or camps) and be pollution.  So we started eliminating all the appliances that we absolutely do not need.  It was a little bit tough to toss out my super-nice (and expensive) blender but once I did it allowed me to prepare in a much better way so this will be a beautiful new lifestyle, not just a temporary time to hunker-down and try to survive.  So we started learning about artesian wells, brick ovens, and exclusively growing our own food, and seed-saving.    

A Vision of Zion

It took well over a year of us making all of these changes before we began to understand where we were headed.  The Spirit was guiding us towards a Zion lifestyle.  The Lord needs people to help with the early establishment of the cities of Zion, it is not everyone's foreordained mission but it is for some people.  The Spirit will witness to those who do have this same assignment and they will know and be guided in the changes they need to make to prepare for this great privilege. 

I love this video, it is what the prophets and apostles (ancient and modern) have been speaking of so we could be prepared to help bring forth Zion.  We have the responsibility and invitation to leave behind the façades and the distractions and the carnality of the world and embrace a lifestyle so beautiful and eternally fulfilling!  What a great blessing!

The Power of an Environment

The power of an environment is huge.  A seed contains so much potential but that great potential remains trapped inside until it is put in the right environment to grow (please read Matthew 13 - the Parable of the Sower, it is very much worth pondering).

Each of us are composed of a physical body and a spiritual body.  Our father and mother are the parents of our physical body while our Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother are the parents of our spiritual body.  Because we (and our children as well) are the offspring of Deity we contain an amazing amount of potential.  We do not have to slave over our children to have them bring forth talents and spiritual gifts, that is already programmed into them.  The main job we have as parents is to create the environment and teach them to recognize and follow their conscience.  Once they understand how God communicates with them they will be able to follow His voice in becoming exactly who God intended for them to become - the same is true for ourselves.  It is never too late to start heeding our conscience and creating an environment where we can develop our spiritual gifts and talents.

First we eliminated all the influence of Satan that we could pinpoint in our home, then we made sure it was an environment that would foster the real spiritual growth that we wanted for ourselves and our children.  Beautiful music, artwork, books that contained true stories of faith and courage, furnishings made of the natural elements.  The truth was that we had many of these things in our home already, it was mostly a matter of eliminating the other stuff that cluttered out the best things that were already there.

Consider the missionaries of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  They dedicate 1 1/2 - 2 years of their lives in an environment free of many of these worldly influences and thus experience spiritual growth like never before.  Then many of them return from their proselyting only to transplant themselves into the same poor soil they had been in before their mission.


We have all the control over what is in our environment.  No reason to invite Satan in and make him comfortable - and who would ever ask him to babysit?  I cannot imagine anyone would, yet we allow his influence to entertain our children through so many different avenues.  Be very aware of what you allow in your environment, if your conscience is the least bit wary of it then throw it out.

Also, ponder on what the environment would be like in Heaven - would we even be comfortable there?  I love this talk (click here) but when I first read it back in 2009 I was quite offended by it because it was nothing like the environment that I had set up in my own home at that time.  Over the years I have repented and realized that God is unchanging and if we want all the privileges and blessings of being in His presence again and learning how to become as He is then we have to be the ones willing to change.  God is so patient with us and willingly providing the atonement specifically so we can change.

  

Satan's Hidden Influence in Our Homes

Satan's influence is so intertwined into our society, our culture, and unfortunately our homes.  After experiencing the mighty change of heart, I was left with heightened spiritual sensitivities and found myself feeling uneasy about many things in our home.  At first we eliminated all the obvious things that needed to go - like the toys and entertainment that did not invite the Spirit.  Even movies or cartoons that contained a small amount of crude humor offended my spirit.  It seemed that just a small stain of the world on something was not to be overlooked - the Spirit was guiding us to eliminate everything that is not worthy of a holy place.  We threw out all the CD's and DVD's except for a few spiritually uplifting ones and then a few months later we just sold the whole television with the entertainment center and every thing else that went with it.

We eliminated all the books that seemed to "dumb-down" our children or fill their precious minds and spirits with nonsense.  We eliminated all the other books that contained only portions of truth mixed in with the philosophies of mankind.  We eliminated the coloring books that had too much of a focus on worldly or abstract things.  Later we eliminated all plastic toys and then moved on to all the other plastic things in our home.

Another area where I felt strongly that we needed to clean-out was our kitchen and pantry.  All the processed foods, all the dyes, and all the genitically-modified ingredients needed to go.

I also felt sick inside that we had so much clothing.  I knew this feeling was God showing me that we needed to make changes.  I recognized that we had more than we needed and because of this abundance we were not grateful for what we had.

Honestly, I had a basket of clothing that needed mended that I had not gotten to in over a year because we did not even notice they were missing from our wardrobe.  So we started a big project of sorting through the clothing.  First and foremost we eliminated anything with cartoon characters on it (see my previous post to understand why).  Once we had that influence out, I then noticed that certain clothing gave me an unsettled feeling and others did not.  So I just sorted everything following this feeling.  In the end I was left with a whole pile of clothing to throw out, these items were made of polyester, spandex, nylon, rayon.  The other pile of clothing was mostly cotton with a couple silk and wool items.

"Why natural fabrics?"  That was the question I was wondering so I searched online and found many good reasons to embrace natural fibers and eliminate the synthetic ones as well as the heavily dyed fabrics.  However, the real answer came as I pondered on the creation.  When Christ created the earth, under Heavenly Father's direction, He created all that man would need and then gave man stewardship over all those things.  This stewardship gave man an opportunity to learn to exercise righteous dominion over the elements of the earth just as Christ did.  When we learn to use the very creations righteously that Christ placed here for us we are taking our first steps toward creating worlds of our own later.  For example:

A woman who makes a dinner from scratch (starting with wheat, natural yeast, potatoes, celery, onions, carrots, sea salt, herbs, etc.) is learning more how to be a righteous steward over the elements than a woman who grabs a box of something processed and heats it up for dinner.

If that first woman had grown her vegetables in her own garden then she would reap the blessings even more for being a righteous steward over the earth.

However, Satan would much rather keep us too busy rushing our children back and forth to their sports practices in the evening than have us use our time learning the basics of Godhood and caring for the health of the body and spirit (see earlier posting about The Fruits of an Over-Scheduled Life).

The Awakening

I continued following my conscience and finding that I was so happy when I was just obedient to it.  Then during the summer of 2012 I had a feeling come over me that a change was coming. I started thinking maybe we needed to move since our fourth child was soon to be born and our house felt small for our family.  However, right after Thanksgiving the change came and it wasn't anything I had expected. It was the mighty change of heart, the spiritual rebirth that King Benjamin's people experienced. For two weeks the Holy Ghost went through my whole body so strongly that I hardly had the physical strength to withstand it. I asked my husband to give me a priesthood blessing just so I could physically endure it, and I even pleaded for Heavenly Father to slow down the things He was teaching me because it was too much at once. I had dreams and visions opened to me that would change the way I think and live forever. This mortal life suddenly became nothing more than a field trip to me and familiar feelings of my thousands of years with my Heavenly parents surfaced and my relationships with my family members here took on a more eternal meaning. I remembered the closeness, love, and support that we had given one another, way before this short experience we have had on earth. I saw destruction and death that would take place, I saw people gathering to our area who would need a place to stay and food to eat, I saw land that was so green and abundantly bringing forth fruit, and I saw beautiful homes. The Spirit told me that we needed to cultivate such land and prepare a home that could welcome in whomever the Lord brought to it.

I was blessed with the spirit of discernment and my spiritual eyes were literally opened to see Satan's influence in our home. It was every where! Seriously, we had gift-wrapped it and given it to our children even! I learned that the popular children's princesses and fairies are nothing more than Satan's way of getting little girls used to the idea of dressing immodestly from an early age. I learned that the popular pink toy ponies are a way of skewing our children's understanding early on of what is real by changing the color and shape of the very animals that Christ created and placed on the earth. I learned that movie heroes and cartoon characters are nothing more than idols that we surround ourselves and our children with. I learned that Santa Clause is nothing more than a distraction to take away the focus from the Savior on His birthday, that the Easter Bunny plays the same role, and that Halloween is truly Satan's holiday. 

I know this sounds judgemental but I learned the truth about all the things Satan has created in this world to distract us from listening to the Savior's voice in our own souls and obeying it. Not all of these things are inherently wicked, what is wicked is the role they play in distracting us. I have learned also that the Lord allowed us to be in this worldly setting with all these distractions truly to test us and see if we would still recognize, embrace, and defend truth when we encountered it.

Once I had this understanding I knew I was completely accountable for what I allowed in my home.  We purged all of these worldly distractions and found that we actually fit very comfortably in our home and it was a good size for our family. Before I had bought into the world's idea that we needed more room with four children, however what we really needed room for was all the stuff we had accumulated. If the Spirit had not taught me this I might have pulled down my barn and built a bigger one to hold all my worldly accumulations, as Christ cautioned us not to do. We have been learning how to only take in what we really need and not go to excess if we are going to live the law of consecration. I hadn't realized how in bondage we had been to all of our stuff until we removed it and felt liberated. 

To learn about King Benjamin's people follow this link:

https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/mosiah/5?lang=eng

To learn about the Priesthood follow this link:
 http://www.mormon.org/beliefs/restoration

Home-Schooling: Our First Step into the Unknown

I had been following the guidance of my conscience pretty faithfully and making course corrections whenever it warned me that I needed to.  Most of those course corrections were eliminating the activities and the entertainment of the world from our family's life.  As our oldest daughter became of age to go to school I felt a nagging at my heart that we needed to look into home-schooling - that was a test for sure!  I was worried about what people would think, and worried if our children would know how to interact socially (which all stems from fearing man more than God). We did all sorts of research and got everyone's opinion and decided not to home-school (against the warning of my conscience). Well, after we sent her to public school I felt so depressed. For 6 weeks she attended public school and for 6 weeks I knew we had made the wrong choice. I finally got up the courage to be obedient and talked with my husband about it, we decided to take her out of public school and that very moment the weight of depression left and so much happiness flooded in. That night I awoke in the middle of the night with ideas coming to me of important things I should teach my children. I knew that Heavenly Father was blessing me for being obedient. 

 It was at this time that I had a dream one night that I was walking quickly, holding hands with my two young daughters and rushing them to make it to our destination. I had no idea where we were going but we were surrounded by other parents hurrying their children to come see this great sight. There were parents and children way ahead of us, all around us, and behind us as well. We were a great group moving forward in the same direction. Finally we came to a large gathering and the girls and I pushed our way through the crowd to see this attraction. I realized with alarm that we were standing at the very edge of a huge waterfall, we were at the top and there were no safety railings in place. The mist from the waterfall covered all the rocks that we were standing on making them wet and slippery. I pulled my girls back quickly and backed away looking at the parents who stood visiting with one another laughing and completely at ease with their children playing at the very edge of this cliff on all the slippery rocks. I couldn't understand why all of us parents had brought our children here. I continued to back away taking my girls with me and then I woke up. I knew the dream meant that Heavenly Father was helping me see the danger of following the traditions of our society that have become more and more corrupt over time.

 

The Fruits of Following Our Conscience

(See previous posts since these truths build upon one another)

As we learn to follow our conscience consistently we show God that we are wise stewards over the communication He has given to our souls and we qualify for greater communication from Him and His servants (the Holy Ghost and angels).

We become purified and will fully receive the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost if we have first been baptised by those holding the priesthood of God.  Many people who have been baptised have yet to receive the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost because they have not been obedient to the guidance they have had since birth.  God blesses us line upon line and precept upon precept.  We will not qualify for and be granted the great privilege of having the Holy Ghost with us always if we have not been willing to listen to the small whisperings of our conscience.  Every good thought or good idea comes from God and when we make a commitment to follow every good thought we have (and repent of and fix the ones that nag at us) we are taking our conscience as a guide.

When we receive the Holy Ghost as our constant companion it is no small matter, it is an eternally life-changing experience.  To become a "new creature in Christ" literally means that you will become someone entirely different with a deeper eternal view of who you are and what your responsibilities are while here in mortality.

This is what happened to me, I took my conscience as my guide and then experienced a mighty-change of heart.  It has led our family down a much different path than we had ever anticipated which I will share in the coming posts.

Side Note:  Our conscience is also known as the "Light of Christ" or the "Holy Spirit" or the "Spirit of Christ" as referred to in the scriptures.   

 

To find out more about being baptised by someone who has the priesthood just leave me a comment or check out:  http://www.mormon.org/

The Temptation to Hide

Our conscience is given to every one of us when we are born.  It is a guide that makes us feel happy when we are doing what is right and makes us feel guilty or anxious inside when we are doing something wrong.  It is basically the tool Jesus Christ uses to show us when we need to repent and when we are on the right path. 

When we have made a mistake Satan knows that we feel guilty and he immediately seizes that opportunity to get us to make yet another mistake.  This is his way of leading us further away from the influence of our conscience.  His  all-time favorite way of getting us headed in the wrong direction is by tempting us to hide our initial mistake.  This was the first tactic he used way back when Adam and Eve ate the fruit and he encouraged them to hide from God.  Pay attention to the times you are tempted to "hide" from something or "avoid" someone.  It is a red-flag that Satan is trying to keep you from really repenting and fixing a problem.  Let me share a simple example:

I am grocery shopping and across the store I see a lady whom I promised 2 months earlier that I would help with a large community project- only I never really did help her.  Suddenly the next thought I have is to turn and head down the aisle so I can dodge her.

Why?  Would it not be easier for me to head straight up to her and say, "I feel so guilty that I never helped you with that project!  I am so sorry, did you get it all done or do you still need some help?"

Dodging into the aisle is exactly what Satan wants us to do - facing the mistake and repenting is the invitation from God.  The first option will always keep us in a state of bondage but the second is liberating and brings happiness.

Now, ponder on this:  Is there something or someone that you are avoiding - maybe a family member, a neighbor, a friend, a debt-collector?  Just be honest and apologetic and willingly do whatever you can to make up for your initial mistake. 

Also, just a note of warning but Satan's other favorite tactic is passing blame - so as soon as you feel that temptation you can know where it came from.  Don't get in the habit of partially apologizing with an excuse tied to it.

The Fruits of an Over-Scheduled Life

God communicates to us through our spirit - when we feel anxious or unsettled it means that something is wrong (usually a warning that we are heading down a wrong path and need to repent and turn back).  It takes time and repeated experiences for us to recognize the way that He communicates with us and how we can respond correctly to His guidance.

What better way for Satan to frustrate God's communication with man than to create loud and fast-paced societies where there is no time for us (or our children) to even recognize that God is trying to communicate with us.

Consider the daily traditions of our society: 8 hours work, 1 hour exercise, 7 hours school, 1 hour practice dance/karate/music/scouts/sports (per child), 1 hour homework, 3 meals - cooking time and clean up, house work, yard work, home maintenance, family prayer and scripture study, personal prayer and scripture study, laundry, showering/grooming, shopping, etc.

This list did not even include all the loud media devices that keep us (and our children) distracted from paying attention to our feelings.

Rushing here and there to fulfil all the daily traditions of our society keeps us busy and seemingly productive, but if we never took the time to recognize what God would have us do with our time and energy were we really even productive?
 

How it all began...

I remember being very young and standing in the bathroom with my parents (and all my siblings in the background giggling), telling them very soberly that it was not me who had drawn on the wall.  I remember the distinct feeling of guilt that I felt inside the entire time because it really was me who had written on the wall.  Inside my conscience was unsettled even though my physical body stood there very seriously insisting that I was innocent.

I remember being at my Grandmother's home when I was little and joking around about a terrible car accident that had just happened and my Grandmother scolding me for being so inconsiderate, and again that unsettled feeling came.

I remember being a teenager and being out past midnight with friends on a few occasions and not even enjoying myself because inside I felt worried knowing that I was supposed to be home.

Honestly, the list of all the times that I felt this guilty conscience could go on and on, but somewhere along the path I got better and better at ignoring it as soon as it came.  Usually I would find some kind of activity to distract myself and over time I became less aware of it.  Once I became a mother it seemed to come back (maybe Heavenly Father knew I would need extra guidance since I lacked good parenting skills or maybe I was finally humble enough to listen, I don't know).  For whatever reason though, I became more aware of it.  It seemed if I gossiped about someone I would feel sick inside until I apologized to the person, the Lord, and learned from the lesson so I would not repeat it.  Often I would feel that anxious, unsettled feeling again when I was shopping.  Every time I made a frivolous purchase I would feel bad about it and have to go through the hassle of going back into the store and returning the item and apologizing to Heavenly Father for not using the resources He had blessed me with more wisely.  Some days it seemed as though nothing I did was right and I would constantly be on my knees asking for forgiveness, but I just kept going through the steps of repentance and every time I felt a complete relief and happiness come through me and my pained conscience would become clear and at peace.  This is when I came to understand who Jesus Christ is.  This is when I came to know Him personally.  This is when He became real to me, not just someone we talk about on Sundays at church or read about in the scriptures, He became my personal Savior.  He rescued me each time I lost my temper, each time I was ungrateful or judgemental, or dishonest, each time I had a prideful or selfish thought.  He was constantly there to take it all from me if I turned to him with a broken heart and contrite spirit.   

This feeling of an unsettled conscience became my alarm system.  Every time I felt it I knew it was my Savior alerting me that I just stepped off His path and needed to fix the problem and come back.  I began to wonder how it worked, it didn't seem that it could be the Holy Ghost because the feeling of the Holy Ghost felt different to me.  Somehow in all my searching I came across Moroni 7 and learned about the role of the Light of Christ.  It all made sense to me and I have used it as my guide ever since.  I had no clue where this would lead, I just knew that I felt good following that feeling inside. 

The more I followed it the more aware of my weaknesses I became.  It seemed I no longer had to buy something frivolous at the store before I felt bad, I could just think about buying something impractical and already that unsettled feeling would come before I even placed the item in my cart.  It became a warning guide that I learned I could count on and I learned that I felt good when I was obedient to it.

Many of us live lives that are too busy and too loud.  We slow down too seldom to just FEEL.  It is unfortunate because that is how the Lord communicates to our souls - through our feelings.  Ignoring those feelings are in essence, ignoring Him.

Obedience

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   The whole purpose of this blog is to be obedient.  We have never blogged, never face-booked, and honestly only turn on the cell phone a few times a month when out running errands.  So putting this all online is quite a stretch for us but the Spirit has told us to share the changes we have made in our hearts and in our home over the past two years so we are doing it.  We do not believe everyone else needs to make these changes, however, we do believe that there are individuals and families who the Spirit will guide to make similar changes and hope some of the things we share will be of benefit to them.

We plan to write this blog anonymously because we are not concerned with recognition or interested in debating any of the topics.  Our only objective is to be obedient in sharing the truths we have learned so they can bless others as well.